accepting the whole

So often, when speaking about accepting the whole, we only truly accept the parts of ourselves that we like. The parts that are good, successful or that we and others deem worthy. However, we don't get to choose which parts of us we keep. One of the beautiful, and sometimes frustrating, things about life, is that we are unfinished, raw and unexplored. These unexplored pieces, in many ways, are what make us unique and allow us to impact the world.

In my own journey of awareness, I have found many surprising pieces of myself that became strong identifiers of my core nature. Of course, there are the pieces that I secretly hold so much pride in: perfectionist tendencies, meticulous organization, persistent leadership and always having care for others. Then there are the pieces that are rather difficult to accept: feeling overwhelmed by the mundane, jealousy of those who have something "better" than me, ease of distractability and lack of confidence in decisions. Ultimately, I hide these "difficult to accept" pieces and other qualities I am ashamed of by failing to acknowledge them. I often hide them underneath a projected image of contentedness to distance myself from the process of growth.

After several conversations in which I asked for reassurance about the image of contentedness I project to friends in person, on the phone or in social media, I was confronted by a loved one. He explained that he felt I wanted to be perceived well at all times and that seemed like it could be a burden. Upon further extensive reflection, I realized that by projecting this image of constant happiness, I was repressing and avoiding my true self. This repression, for many of us, of the pieces of are identity that we don't want others to see is what blocks us from living an aware life.

This recent realization helped me commit to exploring one piece of myself each day. This exploration may be through the blog, a conversation with a trusted friend or through calm inner reflection. I expect this process may be uncomfortable at first, but I hope to become more aware of my true self and work towards acceptance of the whole self. I will commit to exploring each piece and work towards enhancing the positive qualities found, as well as nurturing areas of growth.

I hope this inspires you to make a commitment to exploring one piece of your self each day. If so, I believe you will grow, learn and truly experience a journey to accepting your whole self.